[FB] The Same Shade of Yellow, chapters 5-6

The Same Shade of Yellow, a Fruits Basket fanfic by Raberba girl

Chapter 5 - Secrets

A/N: For those who don't know, 'Niisan (short for Oniisan) means "older brother." Also, Mine's name is pronounced "Mee-nay."

o.o.o

All week Momo tried to follow Kagura's advice by getting up the nerve to go boldly up to Ronnie and ask him out. Something always seemed to go wrong, though - either she had bad timing, or he would misunderstand her, or there were too many people around, or she would lose her resolve at the last minute and say something different.

Once, when the conditions were absolutely perfect, Momo was that close to blurting it out, but she ended up in a fit of giggling instead as she remembered Kagura flinging her beloved Daisuke across the restaurant. She had had to run away to find a safe place to laugh, and that was the end of that opportunity.

By the time Friday afternoon rolled around, Momo was feeling discouraged, so the sound of Momiji's voice on the phone lifted her spirits greatly.

"Hey, hey, Momo! Hello, I haven't talked to you in ages!"

"It sure feels that way," Momo grumbled, even though he had called her almost every day. "I never thought a week could be so long."

"Ah! Sorry, Momo!"

"No, it's all right! I just meant-- well, I missed you."

"Yay! Momo missed me!" He sounded so happy that Momo forgot to be embarrassed. "I missed you, too!"

"So...when are you free?"

"Any time! Every time I try to unpack and set up my stuff, Kagura wants to help and then ends up decorating everything herself, so I finally just decided to leave her to it. Oh! Did I tell you that one of my boxes got lost on the way, and they just found it, so it came in today and it's full of pictures! I've got to show you! My friends and professors and the campus, and also the city where I stayed and museums and lots of cool stuff!"

With difficulty, Momo managed to break through the stream of chatter. "That's wonderful, Momiji-kun. I have some homework to do, but I'll try to finish it up fast, and we can go have dinner or watch a movie or something. I'll pay my share, of course," she added quickly.

"Ah, no, Momo! I'm taking you on a date, so I get to pay!"

"But Momiji-kun--"

"Really! I was thinking we could go to this place close to Ha'ri's house, and there's a playground nearby, too!"

"Playground?"

"Eh, come on, Momo! Don't tell me you've grown out of playgrounds!"

"But, I mean...you're an adult, and I'm in high school, doesn't it seem a little--"

"You don't want to go?"

It suddenly occurred to Momo that the sad, sad note in his voice might be deliberate. Even so, she found herself babbling, "Oh, no, no, no! We can go if you want to, I don't mind! It'll be fun, really."

"Yay! We're going to the playground!"

There was a sudden crash coming from Momiji's end of the line.

"Yah! Kagura's in trouble! Call when you're ready to go, Momo!"

The phone went dead in her hand. "Okay..." Momo murmured. She smiled and hung up.

o.o.o.o.o

The food was good, though Momo barely noticed it because she was so busy talking to Momiji. They talked about Ronnie for a while, then about Germany, and then about their visit to Tohru and Kyo's house. Momiji was already in love with Kia and Tohaku. He had left Japan before any of the children of his generation of Sohmas had been born.

"At least I didn't miss little Hiroshi, though. He's their first. Kisa's nine months already, just a few weeks to go. I bet Hiro's jumpy!" Momiji laughed.

"How long have they been married?"

"Just a year. They're still pretty young, but they've known each other all their lives. We all knew they were meant for each other even when they were little kids!"

"Who else is in your 'generation?'" Momo asked curiously

"Ah, let's see...Haru and Rin, and Aya - he has a little girl I haven't met yet, either -, and Kureno and Uo, and Ha'ri, and Ri-chan. Oh, and I have to say hello to Tohru's friend Hana, too!"

Momo sighed. "You all seem so happy. Everyone knows who they belong with, and there's such warmth and caring between all of you. I...I envy it, a little."

"Things weren't always this way," Momiji said quietly. Momo looked at him in surprise, since it was not often that he spoke with this kind of seriousness.

"Before...before the Sohma curse, as we call it, was broken, things were hard. Akito was sick, more than he is now, and he was put through so much torment and stress. He had no way to cope with it, so he took it out on the rest of us. There was a group of us who-- we were closer to him, I guess you could say, than other people were, and we all suffered a great deal together."

Momiji suddenly chuckled. "It's funny. There we all were, trapped from the day we were born in a cage of nightmares that none of us could find a way out of, no matter how hard we tried. And we did try, some of us very hard. None of us had ever seen that cage from the outside, so we didn't know what to do. And then Tohru came along."

"Tohru-san?"

"Yes. It was like falling dominoes. It started with Yuki and Kyo. Before, the two of them hated each other for real, and they couldn't meet without having a fight or at least an argument. And both of them were hurting. Yuki went through a lot when he was a child, and Kyo too. Tohru somehow - healed them. Very slowly, over a long time, but what she did was amazing. It got so that Yuki, who used to be so cold and selfish, could open up, and become a warm person who truly cared about people. Same with Kyo. He finally found someone other than Kazuma who could accept him as a real person, exactly as he was. And one by one, all of us heard about Tohru and were drawn to her. Hiro has learned how to become a kinder person, who can show his feelings the way they are instead of having to disguise them. Kisa has become more confident and outspoken, and so has Ri-chan. Ri-chan doesn't freak out so much, and he is comfortable now as a man."

Momo decided not to comment.

"Kagura is calmer now, Ha'ri is not so sad, Black Haru hasn't shown up in years...and then there's Akito.... If you had known this family ten years ago, and then left and come back again today, you wouldn't recognize us as the same people." Momiji laughed again. "And you know what? It all happened by accident! Tohru only ended up with us because her relatives decided to have their house remodeled."

Momo laughed politely, but then they both fell silent for a while. Momo played absently with her food, digesting what he had told her, and Momiji stared out the window with a little smile on his face and a distant look in his eyes.

Just when Momo was starting to get bored and wondering whether she should say something or not, Momiji shook himself and straightened up with a smile. "Sorry, Momo! I'm spacing out, aren't I. Are you finished eating? Come on, let's go to the playground!"

In no time Momo had been whisked away, and she was laughing as she ran to keep up with Momiji. He beat her to the playground, and kept running so he could make a flying leap onto the swings. "I bet I can swing higher than you can!"

"You're on," Momo laughed, and plunked into the swing next to him. They pumped their legs and laughed and talked, and were soon soaring high. "This is wonderful!" Momo once shouted on an upswing. "I feel like I'm flying! I haven't been on swings in so long!"

"Flying, flying!" Momiji chanted. "Bunnies don't fly!"

"What?"

"They hop!" Momiji suddenly dragged his feet and jumped out of the swing long before Momo thought it was safe. He hopped away in that speedy way of his, and Momo hurried to disentangle herself from the swing and run after him.

"You sure like rabbits, don't you?" she commented. She sat on the end of a slide, and was glad when Momiji stopped next to her.

"Yup! They're my favorite animal. And my zodiac sign, too!"

Momo smiled. "Really?"

"Mm-hm! What's your favorite animal?"

Momo thought about it. "I think...I like horses. Because they can run so fast, and they're so strong and beautiful."

"You're beautiful, Momo."

Momo stared at him. She noticed suddenly that his face was very close to hers. His lips had softened into a loving smile, gentler and not as dazzling as usual.

"You're beautiful and strong, Momo. You can take on the world, I know it. You don't have to keep running away from things you're afraid of."

Momo stared at him for a long moment. Then, to her horror, she suddenly knew she was going to cry. He had touched on something in her that was buried deep, something she thought she had not been ready to deal with yet. "Mom-iji-...kun...." Her throat felt tight, and there was a strange prickling at the bridge of her nose. She knew that she must not speak again until she had herself under control.

But Momiji kissed her cheek, and she lost it. She sat there sobbing tightly into her hands, hating herself and yet feeling relieved at the same time. He sat next to her and put a hand on her shoulder, not at all disturbed by her tears. "Momiji-kun...." She hesitated, then threw her arms around him, desperate for his closeness. She knew he would not mind.

"Ack! Momo, wait!"

There was a noise like a small explosion. Bright yellow smoke filled the air, and Momo sat there gasping in surprise, her tears damp and forgotten on her cheeks. She realized she was holding something warm and furry, and - oh, gross! - alive. She was about to throw it away from her, but as she raised it, the smoke cleared enough for her to see that it was a rabbit. Momo sat there and stared at it, too surprised to do anything more, and then the thing spoke.

"I'm sorry, Momo...I didn't mean for that to happen when you were trying to have a cry...."

"Momiji-kun?!?!"

"Don't throw me, please! Yes, it's me. Look, there are my clothes."

Momo put the rabbit, not very gently, on the ground, and then skipped back a few steps. As she moved, she felt something sliding off her - sure enough, it was Momiji's clothes, which had become draped over her when he disappeared.

"I don't get it. I don't understand. Momiji-kun? Is that really you?"

"Momo! You're not mad at me, are you?" It was the beseeching voice that she could still not resist.

"Wh-why didn't you tell me?!"

"Would you tell people if it was you?"

Momo took a few deep breaths, then stepped closer and knelt down. "Momiji-kun?"

"Yes?"

She could not be angry at Momiji or disgusted by him, he was just too cute. "Can I...pet you?"

The rabbit's ears twitched with amusement. "Of course!"

The soft yellow fur felt just as nice as it looked. Momo carefully picked him up again and cuddled him in her arms. "You're so cute!"

"Thank you!"

After a minute, Momo frowned. "But, what are we going to do with you, Momiji-kun? Are you like this forever?"

"Nuh-uh, don't worry! I'll change back eventually. You'd better keep holding me 'til we get to a safe place, though. I don't think you want to see me when I change back without my clothes."

"Ack! Yes. Where can I take you?"

"Ha'ri's house is close. We can go there and visit while we wait for me to transform again!"

"Okay." Momiji gave her directions, and she gathered up his clothes and set off. As they walked, Momo thought up several questions that she rather thought she had the right to have answered. "So, how does it work? You turn into a rabbit if you get hugged?"

"Well, it's like this. There's twelve signs of the zodiac, right? And there's also the Cat from the old story about the animals and the banquet. Every generation, a person in the Sohma family is born with a spirit of the zodiac - at least, that's what used to happen. Now that the curse has been broken, we're the last generation of Juunishi. That's Hatori's theory, and he's probably right, since no Dog was born to replace Shigure. Anyway, our problem is that whenever we're in a weak state or we're hugged by a person of the opposite sex, we turn into an animal of the zodiac!"

"Hm." Momo thought about this for a while. "Is that why Kagura-san never hugs Daisuke-san, then?"

"Yes. Kagura's the boar. The only men she can hug are the other zodiac members. That's the way it works, we don't know why. I can hug Kagura, Rin, and Kisa, but any other girl turns me into this."

"Does Daisuke-san know?"

"No. Only the immediate family of the Juunishi know about it, of course, and also Kazuma, Hana, and a few others."

Momo thought some more. "Is Kyo-san a zodiac member?"

"He's the Cat!"

"So then...how do he and Tohru-san...?"

Momiji giggled. "Momo's not so sweet after all!"

Momo blushed madly. "Never mind!"

Momiji spent the rest of the walk telling Momo who was what animal, and funny stories about the trouble the Juunishi had gotten into because of their transformations. By the time Momo was standing at the front door of Hatori Sohma's house, her face hurt from laughing so much. She managed to get herself under control so that she could knock on the door.

"I'll get it!" a sing-song voice shouted from inside. It was so loud that Momo could hear it clearly, all the way on the other side of the door. She also thought that someone else said, "NO, Aya, get back here!" but the next instant the door had been flung open and one of the most gorgeous men Momo had ever seen was leaning out of it. His white-blonde hair cascaded around him in long silvery sheets, his golden eyes were brimming with laughter and mischief, and his clothes were-- Momo cast about, and decided on the word "unbelievable" to describe them.

He grinned at the sight of her. "'Tori-san, your little mistress is here! Better send Mayu-chan out before she notices!"

Momo could only manage a shocked squeaking noise. The beautiful man in the doorway laughed heartily and swept Momo in before she could recover.

"Aya, Aya!" Momiji piped up from Momo's shoulder. "Hi!"

"Huh?" Ayame peered closer. "Ah! It's Momiji-kun! Momiji-kun, you are a rabbit!"

"I know!" They laughed loudly together. Ayame plucked the rabbit from Momo's shoulder. Momo had just started to turn in response to a movement to her left, but then a burst of smoke and a popping noise distracted her. She caught one glimpse of a very skin-covered Momiji in the surprised Ayame's arms. Momo shrieked, dropped the armful of clothes she was carrying, and ran.

Smack into someone. Her arms automatically came up and around the person to break her fall, and then Momo was cast into a second world of disorientation when another pop and more smoke clouded around her. Dimly, she heard Ayame laughing again in the distance.

"Aha ha ha ha! Your girlfriend is very clumsy, Momiji-kun. How cute! I can just see her in roller skates and a disco skirt!"

'I'm going to get a headache,' Momo thought. Then the smoke cleared somewhat, and she could see a stunned-looking seahorse wiggling on the floor beside her, in the midst of a pile of clothes. "ACK! It's a seahorse! It's gonna drown! What do I do?! Doesn't Hatori Sohma transform into a seahorse? Oh no! He'll die!"

Footsteps approached, and someone with a brisk, take-charge voice sighed and said, "Don't freak out, it happens all the time." A woman with her hair tied back in an efficient ponytail stooped down and took the seahorse gently in her hands. "Poor Hatori. You never get a break, do you?"

Ayame laughed and skipped over to them. "Here, Mayu-chan, let me take him. Perhaps he will transform back soon and you will get a surprise treat!"

"I wouldn't trust you with anything, Ayame Sohma," Mayuko snapped, "much less my husband. Go back to the living room!"

"Of course, my Lady!" And then Ayame was gone, and Momo could think again.

Mayuko called over Momo's shoulder, "Hey, are you dressed yet?"

"Almost!" Momiji said cheerfully. Momo turned cautiously to see him buttoning his shirt.

"Momiji-kun, are you okay?"

"Sure! Are you okay, Momo?"

"Um, yes...I think so...that man's laugh makes my head ring, though."

"You'll get used to it," Mayu said. "Mayuko Sohma. Pleased to meet you."

"Momo Sohma," Momo said shyly. For the first time in her life she consciously made a point to meet another person's eyes. Momo and Mayuko smiled at each other.

"You are a very pretty girl, just like your brother," Mayuko said. "And you seem nice, too, unlike Bunny over there."

"I'm nice, Mayu!" Momiji insisted. "It's just that people like you don't appreciate me!"

"And people like me can see straight through you. Now, go on in, both of you. I'll stay with Hatori until he's put to rights again, but in the meantime you can visit with Yuki-kun, Akito-san, and Aya."

"Oh, are Yuki-san and Akito-san here as well?" Momo asked in surprise.

"They live here. It's easier for Hatori to keep an eye on Akito-san when they're in the same house."

"Is it...healthy for Akito-san to be in such...loud surroundings?"

Mayuko snorted. "Aya's only visiting, thank goodness. Luckily he's got a wife and kid at home, otherwise he'd be all over Hatori all the time." Mayuko paused, and added in a gentler tone, "Shigure's death was hard on Aya. He needs Hatori, now even more than he used to." Then she shook herself. "Well, go on! I can't sit here holding Hatori forever, you know."

"Come on, Momo!" Momiji said, and dragged her through into the living room.

Yuki and Akito, kneeling around the table, looked up as they came in. Ayame was talking, and talking and talking and talking, so that no one could greet each other. However, the wonderful smiles that Yuki and Akito bestowed on Momo were so powerful that she felt bathed in welcoming warmth.

"'Niisan," Yuki finally said, quietly and not at all unkindly, "shut up."

Ayame laughed. "Ha ha ha! Perhaps it is true that I am talking too much! How rude of me! I am making it so that only I am talking, and no one else! Ha ha ha ha!"

"Aya, did you bring Mine and the little one with you?" Momiji asked quickly, before Ayame could go on.

"Ah, no, I did not! If I had known you were coming, I would have! You must see my daughter, Momiji-kun, she is the cutest little girl anywhere in the entire world! And I have designed her entire wardrobe myself, with help from darling Mine! Aya-chan's clothes are more beautiful than the clothes of other little girls; they are stylish and fashionable, and she has the full assortment! From princess outfits to school uniforms--"

Momo stared at him, amazed and rather respectful of the fact that Ayame could say all this in the time it usually took a normal person to say the first couple of sentences.

"--and other little girls love coming over, because they like to play dress-up with Aya-chan's clothes! Ha ha ha! But even so they are not dress-up clothes, she wears them all the time, and everyone always says that she is so adorable--"

"You should not have gotten him started on Aya-chan," Yuki murmured to Momiji. "He will talk about her until his voice gives out."

"He must love his daughter very much," Momo said softly. "He seems so proud of her." They said all this underneath Ayame's voice, which had not paused. Akito took a sip of tea.

There was a sound like a soft explosion from the front hallway, and some colored smoke drifted into the living room.

"Ah! 'Tori-san is back!" Ayame exclaimed, and jumped up to go help. Presently he came back, accompanied by Hatori (fully-clothed) and Mayuko.

"Mayuko-san, I had a question," Momo said quickly, before Mayuko even had her legs folded under her. Normally Momo would have waited for a more appropriate time and a more polite lead-up, but trying to say something while Ayame was in the room was like playing Red Light, Green Light. You had to snatch your chance while you had it. "Why did you say that I looked as pretty as my brother? I don't have a brother."

"Ah! I have a brother! His name is Yuki and he is sitting right here in this room at this very moment! For a long time we did not get along well - there was, shall we say, a "chasm" between us brothers - but then I decided that we must become closer, and regain what we allowed to be lost in our childhood! It took quite a while but Yuki finally opened up to me--"

Yuki stood up. "'Niisan," he said firmly, "why don't we spend some quality time together in, say, the kitchen? Or even better, outside?"

Whether Ayame picked up on the hint or not (Momo couldn't tell), he went along with Yuki willingly. "Do you see what I mean?" he was saying excitedly as they left the room. "Years ago Yuki would not have stood to be in the same room with me, but now he has suggested, and it was his own idea, that we have some time together, so you see how he likes me now and would not hurl me into the lake like he used to--"

The door shut. The silence was loud with the echoes of Ayame's voice bouncing around in Momo's head, but soon the air seemed to calm and the quiet grew serene.

Akito took another sip of tea.

Hatori and Mayuko sighed and said in unison, "Thank you, Yuki."

Mayuko turned to Momo. "About what I said. What do you think?"

"What do I think?" Momo repeated, surprised. To her unease, she found that she kept sneaking glances at Momiji, who was kneeling in the place beside her. To stop herself doing that she looked up at the others, and realized that they were all watching her. "I...." She looked at Momiji again. She looked at him for a long time, as he smiled at her and sat patiently still. Then she looked away and said in a cardboard voice, "I don't have a brother. I'm an only child."

Her arms suddenly encircled her body and she bowed over, as if she was ill or in pain. It frightened her somewhat, because she had not meant to do it. She stared at the floor, but no one spoke or touched her. "It's kind of strange, though," Momo said finally. Her voice was low and apprehensive. "You would almost think we were siblings, if you were a stranger and saw us together on the street. I suppose we do look somewhat like each other." A pause. "And...and we both have German mothers. Interesting coincidence." Still in that cardboard voice.

'Plus,' Momo thought, her heart aching, 'There's just the way he makes me feel, like he loves me completely. He is looking out for me, and he wants to spend time with me. He's so comfortable, like someone I've known all my life. I already love him so much, but it's different from the way I feel about Ronnie.'

Momo knew then, in her heart. She had probably known before, but this was the moment when things truly connected for her. She began to cry again, but these were angry, hissing tears. Still, no one spoke or comforted her. Momo did not lift her face - she did not want to see them all watching her. She shied away, ashamed, from what lovely Yuki and Akito surely must be thinking of her. And she did not dare to see the look on Momiji's face as he watched his sister suffer.

After a long time, when her tears had finally stilled, Akito's voice parted the silence as softly as silk would. "It is a painful thing, Momo," he said gently. His voice held such understanding as he went on, "You are so delicate, you should not have to bear such an ugly knowledge. It is best if you forget, hm? Erase this moment, make it as if it never happened, and you will be as happy as before."

Momo looked up at him sharply, and she saw his face. Though Akito's voice had been kind, his eyes held nothing but disdain.

It angered Momo. 'You think I'm weak, then?' she thought. 'Too delicate to hear the truth? You're wrong.'

Akito saw her anger. He smiled a little.

It sent a chill through Momo. The voice, the eyes - it was all deliberate. It was as if, having barely met her, Akito already knew her so well that he could do and say exactly the right things in order to make Momo react the way he wanted her to. And he didn't seem to mind that she knew. 'He has such power over me,' Momo thought. 'But even so...what he wants for me is only what I want for myself.' She looked at Akito as she straightened up and took Momiji's hand. Then she smiled at him, and she smiled at Momiji. Momiji, his eyes filled with tears, smiled back.

"Are you sure you want to hear this, Momo?" Akito said sweetly. "It will hurt."

Momo pressed her head to Momiji's. She smiled to see their mingled hair, so identical in color that up close, you couldn't tell it belonged to two different people.

"Momiji told me," Momo said slowly, "that all of you have gone through lots of painful things in your lives. If I can't...if I couldn't have shared anything else with my brother - I think I would like to share his pain, at least."

"I'm so glad, Momo," Momiji whispered. She squeezed his hand.

When Hatori spoke, he sounded tired. "It is difficult for the women who give birth to the Juunishi. Like many others before her, Momiji's mother - your mother, Momo - could not embrace her child without it transforming to an animal in her arms. Different people deal with this differently, and your mother was one of those who could not accept it. The stress of having a zodiac child was too much for her. She would scream and cry for no reason. Though sometimes she did her best to be a good mother to her son, other times she could not control herself, and she would strike out at him."

Momo's heart wrenched for Momiji's sake. She wanted so badly to embrace him, to comfort him and herself, but all she could do was sit and feel him still and quiet beside her.

"It got to the point where there was no other choice. Your mother could not handle having a zodiac child. For the sake of her own health and sanity...." Hatori did not go on.

Momiji pulled back a little and smiled at his sister. "Don't be afraid, Momo. Ha'ri is a good person. But you can see how we would need his ability sometimes." Momo did not even try to understand. She just accepted it silently when Hatori said,

"I erased her memories of her son. Her husband and Momiji have to pretend that Momiji is the child of another Sohma. Your mother has only a daughter, now."

For a long time they were all silent. Then Momo took in a breath to speak. "Akito-san," she said, "you were right. It hurts." She and Momiji leaned against each other as she continued, "It hurts that, because of Mama, I was never able to know the brother who loves me so much. It hurts that my mother could accept me so easily, and reject another child who was just as good as me, even better."

Momiji smiled at her. "I'm glad you didn't reject me, Momo. But don't be hard on Mama."

"Stop smiling like that!" Momo suddenly shouted. "You're always, always smiling! Don't you hate her? Don't you hate her, for what she did to you? She completely cut you out of her life! She hated you! And you're still-- You still act like you love her as much as--" 'As much as I do.' "But I hate her, too! How could she do this to you?!"

"Will it get you anywhere?" Akito said. Momo stared at him. "Will it get you anywhere, hating your mother because you have found her in a moment of great weakness?"

"If I let what Mama did bother me," Momiji said softly, "then it would not have made me so happy to watch over you. I loved it whenever I saw you or Mama. I would think, 'Because of what I gave up, Mama is happy now;' or, 'My sister is so beautiful and kind, she will do for Mama what I could not.' Every time I saw Mama, it was like getting a present. That made me happier than I would have been if, instead of getting a present when I saw her, I got something sharp that would cut me."

Momo saw what Akito and Momiji were telling her. It was no use hating Mama, because she would never know and it would only make Momo unhappy. Instead, accepting what happiness could be found was better for everyone, even the ones who had been wronged.

Momo sighed. "I'm sorry. It's just-- All this, it's too soon. I don't know what to think about it."

Momiji grinned. "Talk to Tohru. Tohru's good at helping people like that - she's happily married to Kyo, after all, and she stuck with us even when she found out how crazy we all are."

Momo smiled back. "Thank you, Momiji-kun." Then she blushed. "I mean...Oniisan."

Momiji laughed, delighted.

Akito looked sadly into his empty cup, then at Mayuko. She got up, kissed his forehead, and went to get him some more tea.

To be continued....

Author's Notes: Ayame is SUPER-FUN to write. I love him.

Because I wrote this fic before actually seeing some of the characters developed in the manga, I was hesitant to write about Mayuko, since I barely knew her. I think she turned out okay, though. The faint glimpse I got of her in the manga left a very strong impression, thankfully, so I was more sure of Mayu than I was of, for example, Rin and Kureno.

The Same Shade of Yellow, a Fruits Basket fanfic by Raberba girl

Chapter 6 - Momo and Her Mother

This time, Momiji did not come to the house with her. He simply kissed her good-bye and walked away, and she continued up the front walk to the door. Mama was still upset, though.

"Momo, it's late again. I don't like how you spend so much time with Momiji-kun. He's a nice boy, but still, you barely even know him!"

Momo felt a lump coming into her throat, though all she said was, "We met a few times when I was little, Mama. He's been away for a while, and we're catching up on all the time we've been apart."

"Still, you can't have been very close. Not enough to warrant this kind of attention. Or are you seeing him in a more romantic light, now?"

"Mama! That's disgusting!" Momo had forgotten for a second that her mother did not know how closely Momo and Momiji were related.

"He is very good-looking, I suppose, but don't you think he's a bit childish for his age? You should find a more mature young man, one who can take care of you properly when you get married."

Momo covered her face with her hands. "I can't believe we are talking about this."

Momo's father came in. "Welcome home, Momo." He paused and looked at her. "Were you out with Momiji-kun again?"

"Yes. We talked about a lot of things." While staring at Papa, Momo said pointedly, "We thought it was funny how alike we look. And really, Momiji-kun is also the very image of Mama."

"So...he told you, then?" Papa said after a moment.

"He didn't need to tell me," Momo spat out with more vehemence than she had intended. "It rather spoke for itself, didn't it?"

"What are you talking about?" her mother demanded.

"Nothing, nothing," Papa said soothingly. "What are we having for dinner? It smells delicious!"

Mama sniffed. "You and I are the only ones who will be able to enjoy it, I'm afraid. Momo, since she apparently has been well-fed already, will be going to her room and staying there for the rest of the night."

Momo, her face burning with anger, went to her room without a word. She jerked the door shut, threw herself onto her bed, and entertained angry thoughts. An hour or so later, when she had tired of that and was doodling pictures of rabbits, there was a soft knock on the door and her mother came in.

"Momo?" Momo stared at the paper without seeing it as Mama sat down on the bed. "Momo...I'm sorry. I think I've been too harsh with you about...about Momiji-kun. I know he's a nice boy. You'll do well with him."

"Mama, please stop thinking like that! Momiji-kun is just a good friend."

"All right. I understand, Momo."

'Exactly what is it you think you understand?' Momo thought, but she didn't say anything. It was quiet for a while, and her mother started rubbing her back soothingly.

"Mama?"

"Yes?"

"Did you...have you ever - wanted another child?"

Mama laughed in surprise. "Another child? Well, I wouldn't have minded more, but I'm just fine having only you." She bent and kissed Momo's head.

"But, if you did have another child," Momo persisted, "would you be happy? Would you want him?"

"Well, of course I would! Why are you asking this, Momo?"

"What if there was something strange about him? Like, he had - a deformity, or something. Would you still want him then?"

Mama sighed. "Is there a reason for these questions?"

"Mama, please!"

"All right, all right. Well...it would be hard. But even so, there is something precious about the child from your own body. No matter what's wrong with it, it is still your flesh and blood; you can't just turn your back on it."

Momo felt tears running down her face. "So why did you?" she whispered.

"What was that, darling?"

"Why did you?! Why did you turn your back on him?"

"What--"

"Momiji-kun! You rejected your own son, you had him erased as if he never even existed!"

"Momo, what are you talking about?" Mama exclaimed in astonishment.

"He loves you so much! Every time he sees you, it brings a smile to his face! And yet you say hurtful things, like telling him to go home to parents who are worried about him! You erased him! You-- It's like you killed him! Your own son! And he still loves you so much!" Momo was on the verge of not saying it, because she knew it was not true, but then she plunged in recklessly and screamed, "He loves you more than I do! I don't like you at all! I hate a mama who would do such a thing to her own child!"

Mama looked as if she had been slapped. "M-Momo...how could you - say such things to me?" Mama gasped, sounding helpless and close to tears. Momo was suddenly horrified at what she had done.

Papa came into the room. "What is going on here?"

Momo ran out of the room and out of the house, and by the time she slowed down, she was a long way from home. She couldn't bear to face either of her parents, so she stood still and forced herself to stop crying, at least long enough so that she could call Momiji.

o.o.o.o.o

Kagura's apartment was small and neat, though here and there the walls were scarred by nicks, gashes, and spots of paint. Momiji ushered Momo in and closed the door. Kagura, sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea, looked up in surprise. "Momo-chan! What are you doing here this late?"

"Kagura, is it all right if Momo stays with us for the night?" Momiji asked.

"Is that what you called about, Momo-chan?" Kagura asked.

"Yes."

Kagura's eyes narrowed. "What is it? Did someone hurt you? I'll rip his guts out!"

It wasn't just talk. Momo knew that Kagura really could and would do what she said. "No, no! I'm all right, I just...um, got in a fight with my parents."

"Oh." Kagura relaxed, and her face softened into a smile. "You're a teenager, that's natural. Everyone has times when they don't get along with their parents."

"If you don't mind, I'd like to go to bed now," Momo said.

"Of course! You can have Momiji's bed, and he'll sleep on the couch."

"Hey!" Momiji whined. "Thanks for asking!"

"I can sleep on the couch--" Momo started.

"Nuh-uh, Momo, I was just kidding! You can sleep in my bed!"

"Here, Momo-chan," Kagura offered, "I'll show you the bathroom."

Later, after Momo had gotten into bed, Momiji came in to check on her, and to say good night.

"Oniisan...." Momo caught his hand. She pulled him close and whispered shakily, "Oniisan, I said nasty things to Mama. I feel horrible, but...I still can't - forgive her. I'm the worst." Momo felt too disgusted with herself to cry.

Momiji kissed her forehead. Momo expected an encouraging, moralistic speech, but all he said was, "We still love you, Momo." Then he smiled at her and left.

As Momo lay half-asleep in the darkness of the room, she could hear Momiji's voice drifting through the door. He was talking on the phone.

"Hello? Hi, Papa, it's me. Yes, Momo's staying with me and Kagura tonight. Yes! Oh, of course not! Yes, yes. Bye, Papa. I love you."

To be continued....

Author's Notes: Ugh, I hate this chapter. Momo's mom seems all sweet and loving on the outside, but I think she doesn't like me. She just won't let me get inside her head or something. This chapter probably gave me more headache than the rest of them put together, and I even had to go so far as to consult my sister and my mother for help.